Note to Readers: In this encounter, my words are in regular type and the words that the Lord was speaking to me are in italics. This was written during the encounter, which was in 2021. Three years later, rereading this, I realized how much difference this encounter and healing of my heart has made. I have grown tremendously in my confidence, my peace, my feeling of acceptance and being cherished and loved. I am no longer afraid of rejection.
I had just woken up from a bad dream in which I experienced rejection from my close friends and family. I was upset from the dream because it brought back bad memories of other rejection over my lifetime. I brought the issue to Jesus in prayer and asked for him to be with me to bring healing to those memories, and to set me free from rejection and shame.
I pray that as you read this, it will launch you into your own encounter with Jesus -- for wherever you need healing and freedom....
Lord, I bring this dream to you, and these bad memories, too. I invite you to come into these memories with me. What do you want me to see? Where is my heart hurt, and how do you want to bring healing?
I am the One who sees you. I know you. I see the place in your heart that others do not see. The tender place of wounding and the fear of rejection. The shame of not being approved. Let Me come to you and bring healing to that place inside. That little girl place that always worried about having a place at the lunch table. The desire to be included. See yourself as MINE. You belong to Me, and I am always there with you. Therefore, you can feel honored no matter where you are. YOU are the desired one. With Me you are always in the honored seat, for I am always with you. If you see yourself that way, then you will be willing to let others look to you – rather, look to Me inside you – to be the place where they want to sit. Be willing to be with those who are looking up to you, rather than wanting to be with those whom you look up to. Be content with the “least of these table.” There you will find Me. There you will find life and love and meaning. More than those who are interested in themselves.
Think about it. Don’t those “more important ones” – the ones you think you want to be with – simply want to talk about themselves? Who are the ones who want to listen to you? Usually these are the ones who are younger or less well respected in the important circles.
Learn this and teach it to your children. You can have much more influence if you will see yourself as the one who is accepted and loved already – by Me – rather than as the one who needs to be loved and accepted by others.
[The Lord led me to a table where no one else was sitting, and then he sat across from me.]
Even if you sit all by yourself, you still will have Me. I am better than a table full of people talking about themselves, right? Don’t fear missing out. You will never miss out when you choose Me - or when you choose the least of these. In choosing what is least, you are actually choosing what is best.
See yourself this way: the one who is loved by the Father. Watch as I love you and honor you. I love to do this. Take time now to see what it looks like…
Remember the dream from decades ago. You are sitting at the long banqueting table, and I have placed a banner over your chair. “This is the one I love.” I am serving you by my very hand – all the delicacies are for you. I long for you to see yourself this way, my daughter.
Spend some time here with Me … Watch what I do. I am sitting directly across from you. My eyes are on you. I am listening to your heart. I am feeding you strawberries and raspberries dipped in dark chocolate mousse cream. I am full of joy. I am deeply enamored with you. I don’t need anything from you, so you are free to simply enjoy Me, and you can enjoy the way I enjoy you! Stay here with Me. Don’t get up and leave this place so quickly. Just enjoy. Let this place become part of who you are! Don’t try to compare anything else – or anyone else – with this. I AM your truest love. I am enough!
Here in this place, you are sitting across the table from me. Nothing can touch the love that we share here. As you place each of your fingertips on each of my fingertips. There is nothing happening anywhere else – up the table or down the table – that is worth being distracted by. This is what is best. Choose this and you will always have joy – joy unspeakable and full of glory!
Take time to experience it. What does it feel like –
Lord, I watch and experience as each of your fingertips touch each of my fingertips. The look on your face is so full of love, so sweet and inviting. You say, “I am yours and you are mine.”
This is your destiny in Me. Fellowship with Me at the level of bride and bridegroom, but simultaneously like being the honored princess at her daddy’s table. It is outside the realm of human analogy – because here there is no brokenness or selfishness. No need to self-protect. No lust or control. Nothing dark. All is light and all is love, purest, deepest love. Watch what it looks like as my fingertips touch yours. I am recognizing the uniqueness of you. There is no one else who has this same experience because it is unique as your fingerprints are unique to you. We fit together in a way that is unique to us.
And I Am Limitless Love. So I can meet uniquely with each and every one of my children, even simultaneously! Don’t get hung up on the limits of your own imagination. Stay. Stay here. Each fingertip touch is powerful. It goes deep. I am imparting a unique code of my love to you here. Feel it going deep within you.
Now, in light of how I see you, how do you see others? When you see yourself this way, does it matter if the others (the ones you thought you wanted to sit with) are laughing with each other at another table across the way? Remember what you have here with Me and how valuable this is! Having fellowship with who I Am – being my guest at my table – isn’t that better by far? You don’t have to be accepted by anyone else. I am enough!
Feel the intimacy that brings deep satisfaction. Does it matter what others are doing or saying while you are here in this place with Me?
No. This place feels like the best place. Now, will you please help me to see it even when I am tempted to feel rejection? Help me to see that you are never accusing me. You are never rejecting me. You never shame me. When you speak my name, you do it with love and mercy and compassion, not judgment. Bring healing to my little girl heart, so I can hear my full name (“Pamela”) spoken without hearing judgment and shame.
Look at Me, and see yourself as my honored guest. When you walk into a room, you walk in with Me. I am holding your hand. I am your divine escort. While others may not see Me, they will see the confidence that you have because you are aware of my presence with you.
When you walk into an airport with Me, you will not fear what anyone says to you. You will have Me by your side. I will protect you from the accuser. I will protect you from shame. They must flee in the light of my love! You will not worry about what others think. Whether you get every instruction right or not – it won’t matter. It won’t matter in the least. You will be free from accusation. Free from shame!
That part of you that wants to shout, “not my fault!” – I have brought healing to that part of you – I have done the necessary heart surgery. I see ALL of you, all of your heart, and I love you just the way you are! I love you no matter what. Even if you make a mistake! I love you and accept you always! And I don’t look down at you in disdain. I don’t demand perfection. I love the little-girl you, the one who still makes messes. I don’t point out your mistakes or laugh at you. I don’t shame you. I am your champion! I honor you as my daughter – my dearly loved daughter!
See yourself as I see you!! See yourself as the one who holds my hand. I hold your hand. I am right near you! My fingerprints are imprinted on yours. Everything you touch is filled with my Love!!
Lord, thank you so much for the healing. My heart is much more free! I know that I am accepted and loved. And I am no longer afraid to sit alone. I trust that I will no longer be a victim of shame, because I know where I stand with You. You are always there beside me, and you are always for me, not against me.
